The Envy of All Men

Prompt: The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there. ~ Clement Clarke Moore

Thanks Caroline!


 

“Can I just say the world is a better place now.”

“Lucky, you’re being overdramatic. I never said I was committed to the name.”

“You did, you so did. You had blankets made.”

“That….may be true, but it doesn’t mean anything.”

“What made you decide that Sebastian Morgan was a nogo?”

“To be honest, Jason.”

“Seriously? I didn’t think he cared about names.”

“Apparently, he has some strong feelings about certain ones.”

“We all do. It was a horrible name.”

“Shut your face. You of all people have no room to talk.”

“Hey, my name is Lucas. Lucky is a nickname, it’s not my fault. See? My parents did it to me. You could have inflicted that damage on poor poor David.”

“First, you introduce yourself as Lucky, so the time to blame your parents has passed. Two, Sebastian—again—is perfectly nice name.”

“Did you tell Jason why you picked it?”

“…No.”

“Ha. I knew it He doesn’t care that you read trashy romance novels, but he might care you’re naming your kids for them.”

“Let’s just discuss that you even knew Sebastian came from my books. Have you been dipping into the book stash Gia, Brenda, and I share?”

“You think Gia doesn’t tell me these things? You think I don’t know why you women read these books?”

“I know she doesn’t and you have no idea why we read them.”

“For ideas.”

“…for the kinds of men we should be dating…? Or sex ideas? Because both are wrong, and both are nasty. Lucky. Why are we friends again?”

“Something about not being able to fight fate. I hope you’re not looking for advice on men. Sebastian was the guy who kidnapped the one woman right? From those flower books.”

“I am so disturbed right now.”

“Don’t be mad because I know what women are thinking.”

“The levels of bullshit emanating from you at the moment are staggering.”

“I am the envy of all men.”

“I’m going to need a barf bag.”

“Lizzie, don’t mock what you don’t understand.”

“Oh, I definitely don’t understand you. But I can’t wait to tell Gia you read romance novels—”

“Whoa, wait, I never said I read them—”

“—because this is going to be so much fun. You can join our book club!”

“—let’s not be hasty—”

“We’re reading Courtney Milan next month, in honor of Christmas.”

“I’m afraid to ask.”

“Because Gia discovered her two Christmases ago, so we always read her for Christmas, but Brenda argued for Sabrina Jeffries’ Christmas book this year—”

“You’re just torturing me now—”

“Oh, this is going to be so much fun. We’ve never had a guy in the club before. Nadine brought her boyfriend once, but—”

“Lizzie, what can I do to make you keep this to yourself? What can I give you?”

“You can stop calling me Lizzie.”

“Um. How about something I can actually do?”

“You can admit you actually read some of the books.”

“…I like the spy ones. With the wars and stuff.”

“Don’t mumble, Lucky.”

“There was a good one. With some spies.”

“Good. And you can hang these stockings on the wall—”

“What, why? Can’t Jason do it?”

“Where’s my phone? Gia has to plan for one more—”

“All right, all right. I hate you.”

“Merry Christmas, Lucky.”

“Merry, Christmas, Lizzie.”

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Comments

  • this one had me laughing

    According to Nicole on December 24, 2014